Ups and downs

Today is a very peaceful day. Had discussion for an hour plus in the morning..Finally i no longer feel like i'm the only one doing the job. Bad news..They just told me that i might need to go back to HP to do integration of the 2 systems. Hiahz..

I met Jing for lunch at china square..so crowded..but lunch was not bad. Kinda good to be back in office. Been meeting my frens for lunch..catching up with things..Came back from lunch. Got a surprise message from msn..ha ha..we chatted the entire afternoon..Oh..not him hor..my another fren. Nice chat..Ha ha..another programmer also..working 2 streets down from my work place. Prob will meet for lunch some day.

Came back right after work..no activity for the day. I thought the entire day will turn out good..But the moment i step home..i argued with my dad. "I dun like ur tone of speaking these days." I came home early to please them cos they said i always come home late..the moment i open my mouth..i get that remark..So wats the pt of coming home early. This morning was also the same. Tears just rolled down when i was preparing for work. I envy my frens whose parents realli understand them. Maybe thats one reason why i'm so hard up for love..so hard up for someone to be there for me. I appear to my frens as very happy and out going. Indeed, my happiest moments are the times i spend with u my frens. Every day i just hide myself in my room the moment i come home cos i dun want to go through the ups and downs. I just wish that my day will end happily and not crying. I haven felt this way for a long time cos i run away from it.

Try toking to them? i did..i ended up crying..how many times it has been like this..I'm tired...Realli hope that someone will hold me when i fall..Make me smile when i'm sad..Wipe my tears and cheer me up again. That was the reason why i treasured u so much and didn't wanna let go cos i dun wanna be alone to face the world again..I thought i'm stronger now since i'm older..but i'm wrong...